Communication

I'm just going to come out and say this.

I've been thinking alot about things, as I usually do. I've been reading about the human mind, how it works, why we think the way we do, the way we communicate, how to build relationships. I love to watch people, I recently got an email from a friend who stated that I "size people up"... I don't totally agree with that. I do care about people, people I don't even know. I'll sit in the mall and watch people. Yes, I'm that person. I wonder how they are, where they came from, what their thinking about, if they're struggling, where they are in life, what they're happy about, etc. Most people try to hide the way they feel. Lots of times, it's easy for me to see that. It's easy to see in the way they interact, how they're feeling. Sometimes people don't show emotion, but that's just another sign of how they're feeling.

Be observant with others. Be intentional, if you really care. Consider others before yourself. Be real. Ask questions.

Why else was communication invented? We aren't supposed to sit in silence, look at each other, assume this or that, and go on with life. But why do we do that? We don't like the real stuff. Unfortunately, we like the artificial facts. Apparently they're more appealing to our tastebuds than genuineness. That's why americans are fat. We don't like to break it down, get down to what's good for us, what we really need, what's going on. We like the candy coated version, which is only doing us more harm in the end.

I was recently reading a book that quoted Shakespeare,

"All the worlds a stage and all the people are merely players."

To identify with people, we must consider the stage each of us is performing on.

We must be considerate, we must communicate to one another. We tend to think everyones at the same point in life as we are. Whether it's good or bad. We like to think we're all at the same level. Wrong, again. You can't put people on the same level as yourself. We all require different things. We can't relate to each other with that kind of thinking. That's why we really have to get to know each other. See where we're coming from. Let people know you care about them. Be verbal with them. Verbal? Yes, that's called communication. Don't be scared, it really is a good thing. If you really care about someone and want a real friendship/relationship, ask questions. Not just surface. Dive deeper. Go to the place where you want to take it.

Is that why most relationships are surfacey? Because we really don't want to take it further? Even though we like to think otherwise.

Hmm. Interesting.
Think about it.

Relationships shouldn't be a chore, but they do require work.

A Gift

I've been given this gift, it didn't come in shiny paper or with a big, huge bow. I found it hidden down deep, I searched. I've seen what it can do, I've heard what it can do, now I have to find out for myself how and to what extent I can use it. Sometimes I think I need to wear a sign, "Caution"..."Handle with Care"..."Fragile". I'd wear the sign not only for other people, but for myself too. I tend to get caught up in things and take on the emotions of others. I have to remind myself to take it easy. I always want to take on others burdens and fix them for myself.

Father, I can't do this without you, give me strength and guidance.

With this gift, people think, Oh, she's trying too hard, she's fake, she wants something in return. I'm not looking for a gold star. I'm not keeping track. I don't need the praise. I see potential. I see the need. I see the heart of the matter. I see what I want to do. I do what I think I should. I don't do it for myself. I don't need a pat on the back. Life doesn't give rewards, stars, or cards. I'm not one that wants the spotlight. I don't need the attention. But thank you.

I'm a daughter of my Father who longs to please Him with what He's given her. He's given me so much, that I can only try and give back to Him. I watch the people around me... they watch me, try to analyze, they assume, they have their own opinions. I see it. I feel it. I know they judge me. Or am I judging them for thinking their judging me? I don't know. But I just know how my heart feels.

I ask Him,

Father, why do they judge me? Why do they assume? Can't they see I long to please you? Can't they see how I want to do what you've told me to do?

He gently replies,

Sweet daughter, I see what you're doing. Shouldn't that be what you're thinking about? I see your heart. You will be rewarded.

Oh Jesus, yes, that's all I long for. I won't be worried about them. Have your way, Lord. I know you see the heart of what I'm doing.

Thank you for giving me this gift. This gift is the most precious to me. Unlike anything I've ever received. I promise to cherish it, to take care of it, and use it for Your glory. And Yours alone. I can't take credit, I don't want to. I can only do the best I can, to give back to you, what you've given to me.

Sweet Savior, my heart longs for people. I want them to see you through me. I pray that they would also have a heart to serve.

I am your servant. I am your daughter. I am confident in that. I am a child of God. How could I not serve you? You've given me so much. You're my Provider. Thank you. Just as I pray every day, that you'd be honored and glorified in my actions and words. Be in my midst. I know you're there. I feel you. Thank you. That's all I long to be. I won't listen to the lies. I want you above all else. More than my closest relationships. You are my ultimate love.

I can't be all they want me to be. I can't fulfill those voids and insecurities they want me to. Give them hearts to seek you. Mend their brokeness. I pray I can be of help though... there goes that gift again. It's my heart. It will be with me forever. Only you can do the healing. You are the Ultimate Healer. Not just in sickness. You've healed me. You've restored me. And that's not where it stops. You're still at work in me. I strive to continue to draw in closer.

Thank you for trusting me with this gift. For believing in me to be responsible with it. Help me to use it in the right ways and at the right times. I pray that I would be able to polish this jewel, so that it will shine bright, that others would be able to see what you've done in me, so that in return they would long to find their gifts and put them to use. I know this is not the only gift you have given me and you are still revealing all of them to me. So, I thank you. Continue to show yourself.

Walk beside me, Lord.

Guide me.