Anticipating the Voice of God: Week One

Hope you're ready to dig, dive, induldge, throw yourself into Discerning the Voice of God with me. We are on week 4, but I am going to start from the beginning and share with you the lessons, my notes(which is almost all that she said, ha), and my thoughts.

I'm so excited to share this with you, but I will not be nearly as good as Priscilla Shirer is. This has been a Bible study where I want to write down EVERYTHING she says! All the little nuggets she gives are right on and amazing. I encourage you to buy the book, or even get the videos! If you do, you'll understand what I mean. But for now on, you have me and mostly my illustrations, some hers. But I can't take credit.

Let's go from a personal realtionship with our Savior to an intimate relationship.

Turn off all the voices that are surrounding you, whether it's peers, yourself, TV, etc... and let's focus on listening to the voice of our Sweet Savior.

In Matthew 17:1-13 the Lord took Peter, James, and John with him upon a mountain top where he transfigured before their eyes.

Can you imagine that?

Verse 2 tells us that His face shone like the sun, and his clothes just as white as light. On down, Peter begins talking to the Lord, and as he's talking, the Lord says, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased. Listen to him!"

Our God speaks, we just have to tune our minds to actually listening to Him. He can and will speak to you. We must believe, do you believe that He will do what He has promised us? How personal is your relationship if you don't talk or can't hear Him? It's like any other relationship. It takes time. It takes communication and trust.

Think of your closest friends, you talk to them all the time, don't you? You call to see how they are, what they've been up to, how things are going, you want them to keep in contact. That's how God is. He calls on us, He wants us to answer. He wants to know how we are, what we've been up to, how things are going. He wants us to be honest with him. He longs for a deep, intimate relationship with us. It takes communication. If you lose communication, you lose contact.

Don't lose contact with Him.

Anticipate that He will speak. Expect that He will speak.

'My sheep hear My voice, I know them, and they follow Me.' -John 10:27

1) Jesus was clear to point out a relationship, naming us His sheep.

"My sheep"

We're apart of His flock. He is our shepherd. Just like a shepherd herding his sheep. They have a certain call for their sheep, a call for each individual one. They could call a certain way and that one sheep knows that their shepherd is calling it and wants it to come. Just like our Lord. He calls us each at different times and in different ways. We must listen to Him for instructions. God is our navigation system.

Anyone ever used navigation system? I have and I got lost. Why? Because I did not listen. I did not know how to use it. We must unclog our ears and be willing to listen for direction in life.

He tell us,

"Take a right, my child, keep going, you're doing good, quick left, you'll want to avoid the traffic (being confusion or nonsense) up ahead... when you reach the fork in the road, call on Me, and I'll lead you."

He will direct us and make our paths straight. Trust in Him.

Who do you belong to? Is He your Shepherd?

2) Jesus points out not only a relationship but a result of being His sheep.

"... hear My voice."

'The one who is from God hears God's words.' - John 8:47

Don't doubt what He can do. Don't doubt who He is.

We must expect that He'll speak to us, as I mentioned before.

We must want what He has personally for each of us. We are all different, and we each require different things.

He will prove to you that He has your best at heart and it will blow your mind. He speaks in diferent ways to all of us. We have to learn to know when He is speaking to us.

Take a radio for instance, you have to be where you want/can listen, you have to tune into the station you want to listen to, sometimes it's hard to hear through the static, so you have to search and find that special spot where the voice is so clear, so you can sit and listen. You soak in everything the persons saying.

That's how God is. We must want to listen. We have to be so in tune with Him so we can hear His voice in a clear and intimate way. When we do that, we can sit and soak up everything He's telling us.

3) Jesus points out a relationship, a result, and also a reason for being His sheep.

"I know my sheep."

Intimacy is the foundation for getting to know God.

He knows us, each and everyone of us. He knows us better than we know ourselves.
Isn't that crazy to think that out of ALL the people in this world, He knows each of us in such a different and loving way then He does the person sitting next to you... and He loves us all the same? I love thinking about that. Do I have that much love for Him? Do I want to know Him as much as He already knows me?

4) Jesus points out a relationship, a result, a reason, and also a reponse from His sheep.

"They follow me."

Don't doubt Him.

Trust Him.

Follow Him.

Know Him.

'I am the good shepherd. the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep.' -John 10:11

'Now may the God of pease... the great Shepherd of the sheep - with the blood of the everlasting covenant, equip you with all that is good to do His will.' -Hebrews 13:20-21

Clear communication with God begins when I approach God and His Word with anticipation expecting Him to speak.

HE SPEAKS
'I will stand on my guard post and station myself on the rampart; and I will keep watch to see what He will speak to me' -Habakkuk 2:1

HE ANSWERS
'Call to Me, and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.' -Jeremiah 33:3

HE HEARS US

'My God will certainly hear me.' -Micah 7:7

Be assured. A lot of times we doubt that He hears or that He will answer us. These verses are such a great reminder that He will speak, He will hear, and He will answer us.

Strengths Finder 2.0

I took my Strengths Finder test yesterday and thought I would share my results with you.

If you're wondering what a Strengths Finder test is... here goes...

"Rooted in more than 40 years of research, this assessment had helped millions discover their natural talents."

It was funny because all my friends have taken the test so they were trying to guess my strengths. The winner award goes to... drum roll please... Coo! She guessed at least 3 of my top 5. Way to go! :-)

Alright, here are my Top 5 Strengths:

1) Developer

2) Belief

3) Includer

4) Empathy

5) Positivity

Here is a description of each strength:

1) Developer - You see the potential in others. Very often, in fact, potential is all you see. In your view no individual is fully formed. On the contrary, neach individual is a work in progress, alive with possibilities. And you are drawn toward people for this very reason. When you interact with others, your goal is to help them experience success. You look for ways to challenge them. You devise interesting experiences that can stretch them and help them grow. And all the while you are on the lookout for the signs of growth - a new behavior learned or modified, a slight improvement in a skill, a glimpse of excellence or of "flow" where previously there were only halting steps. For you these small increments - invisible to some - are clear signs of potential being realized. These signs of growth in others are your fuel. They bring you strength and encouragement because on some level they know that your helpfulness is both genuine and fulfilling to you.

2) Belief - If you possess a strong Belief theme, you have certain core values that are enduring. These values vary from one person to another, but ordinarily your Belief theme causes you to be family-oriented, altruistic, even spiritual, and to value responsibility and high ethics - both in yourself and others. These core values affect your behavior in many ways. they give your life meaning and satisfaction; in your view, success is more than money and prestige. They provide you with direction, guiding you through the temptations and distractions of life toward a consistent set of priorities. This consistency is the foundation for all your relationships. Your friends call you dependable. "I know where you stand," they say. Your Belief makes you easy to trust. It also demands that you find work that meshes with your values. Your work must be meaningful; it must matter to you. And guided by your Belief theme it will matter only if it gives you a chance to live out your values.

3) Includer - "Stretch the circle wider." This is the philosophy around which your orient your life. You want to include people and make them feel part of the group. In direct contrast to those who are drawm only to exclusive groups, you actively avoid those groups that exclude others. You want to expand the group so that as many people as possible can benefit from its support. You hate the sight of someone on the outside looking in. You want to draw them in so that they can feel the warmth of the group. You are an instinctively accepting person. Regardless of race or sex or nationality or personality or faith, you cast few judgements. Judgements can hurt a person's feelings. Why do that if you don't have to? Your accepting nature does not necessarily rest on a belief that each of us is different and that one should respect these differences. Rather, it rests on your conviction that fundamentally we are all the same. We are all equally important. Thus, no one should be ignored. Rach of us should be included. It is the least wer all deserve.

4) Empathy - You can sense the emotions of those around you. You can feel what they are feelings as though their feelings are your own. Intuitively, you are able to see the world through their eyes and share their perspective. You do not necessarily agree with each person's perspective. You do not necessarily feel pity for each person's predicament - this would be sympathy, not Empathy. You do not necessarily condone the choices each person makes, but you do understand. This instinctive ability to understand is powerful. You hear the unvoiced questions. You anticipate the need. Where others grapple for words, you seem to find the right words and the right tone. You help people find the right phrases to express their feelings - to themselves as well as to others. You help them give voice to their emotional life. For all these reasons other people are drawn to you.

5) Positivity - You are generous with praise, quick to smile, and always on the lookout for the positive in the situation. Some call you light-hearted. Others just wish their glass were as full as yours seems to be. But either way, people want to be around you. Their world looks better around you because your enthusiasm is contagious. Lacking your energy and optimism, some find their world drab with repitition or, worse, heavy with pressure. You seem to find a way to lighten their spirit. You inject drama into every project. You celebrate every achievement. You find ways to make everything more exciting and vital. Some cynics may reject your energy, but you are rarely dragged down. Your Positivity won't allow it. Somehow you can't quite escape your conviction that it is good to be alive, that work can be fun, and that no matter what the setbacks, one must never lose one's senseonf humor.

Think these are a good fit for me?

Interested to find out what your strenghts are?

Check out Strengths Finder 2.0 by Tom Rath at your local bookstore!

Catch Up & A Gas Adventure

It's been a long time since I have posted, my apologies. Things have been crazy here on my end, but I have found time between meetings, work, and finding a job to update you guys. I have started many posts, but have not finished them, I have them saved to my computer. This post will probably be a hodge podge, so be prepared. :-)

For those of you who don't know, my last day of work was Friday, so this week is crunch time, trying to find a new job. I must say, I've enjoyed the little bit I have acutally been able to sleep in. Much needed. I am already to the point of boredom, so I need to find a job...ASAP! Please join me in prayer for a job that I will enjoy and will be a place where I can make a difference.
I am starting to realize that during this time, the Lord is really wanting me to be still and wait on Him. Sometimes I think,

but God, I'm hungry, poor, need gas. Lord, I need a job now!

He quietly reminds me,

Daughter, be patient. Trust me, I have your best at heart. I will take care of you.

For instance, last Friday, my last day of work... Nashville decided to run out of gas. Perfect, not! I was on E!

Just my luck, I thought.

I started my quest to find gas, surely somewhere HAD to have gas. One side of town to another, no gas to be found. By this time I'm stressing... badly... and my gas light is on. I decided I should try to make it home. Although, I figured if I ran out on the interstate TDOT would come to my rescue and fill my tank... then I started noticing all the cars on the side of the interstate, flashers flashing, not moving, no one in them. Guess TDOT realized people would try to take advantage of them...

Oops, sorry Lord for even thinking that.

I finally made it home and took a 2 hour nap... stress will wear you out!

I had been talking with my roommate, Coo, who was at work, and we decided that when she got home we would take her car out and try to find gas. We went to different places, called some people... no gas. Our friend Megan called me and said she got one of our Pastors Costco cards and that they had gas! Coo and I were on the opposite side of town and decided to book it to Bellevue.
Now, let me just tell you this... Coo is a very, how do I put this... safe driver... so you can only imagine our drive. Megan called back to tell us she was 10 cars away and that Costco will close at 7:30pm. I looked at the clock in the car and saw 7:00pm staring back at me.

"Step on it, Coo!" I exclaimed.

We realized we had to get to Bellevue, get a gas container for me, and get in line... all in 30 minutes! Megan called about every 5-10 minutes telling us she was 7 cars away, 5, 3, 2...which was helpful but stressed Coo and I out even more. Haha.

Now to set this up for you...
Coo is driving, I am in the passenger seat shouting directions, and we're both cracking up all at the same time.

"Step on it, Coo. You're going to have to go faster than that. Left lane, get on over. Watch out, car in the way. Over, get on over. Now. Come on. Speed up. We gotta get a gas container when we get off the exit. Go to the right. We can make it. Jesus, help us!"

repeat this for about 15 minutes. Haha.

By Megans last call, I was jumping out of the car, running in the gas station, buying a gas container, (the cashier was cracking up), running back to the car, and hopping inside.
Megan was pumping gas and called to tell me to just walk up to her car and fill my container.
Coo and I arrived at 7:25 and the line was so long. I tumbled out of the car (while Coo got in line to wait), casually walking through traffic, afraid people were going to jump me and start yelling at me, since they could clearly see what I was doing... Carrying a gas container. I sneak up to Megans car and we realized the container was only 1 gallon!! But whatever, I got my one gallon and Megan got a full tank. :-) Megan left and I got back in the car with Coo. She wanted to try and fill up since she had half a tank. We were one car away from filling up when they RAN OUT OF GAS!!!!

We laughed, left, and decided to eat.

Stress will:

1) wear you out

and

2) make you hungry! :-)

Anyway, so we gave up and headed home. We were getting off on our exit and noticed the Shell station, which was out of gas earlier in the day, was open and had gas! We got home, and I filled my hungry Mazda with it's single gallon of gas,

and I told Coo,

"I'm going for it. I'm going up to the gas station, I'll let you know how bad the line is"

I got in line, turned my car off to save my precious gallon of gas and inched my way to the gas pump. Start, stop, repeat for 30 minutes. Finally, I got to the gas pump and I was so excited. The lady across from me was cracking up. I hopped out of my car, fed my hungry car, did a little hop, skip and jump, and plopped down in my car and headed home... thanking the Lord the whole way. (Oh and Coo was able to get gas too!)
I got home around 12 o'clock and started getting ready for bed. I was pulling back my comforter and the Lord clearly spoke to me. I felt like He was standing right beside me. I had never heard Him so audibly.

He said,

See, my child. I will take care of you. I have your best at heart. Don't doubt me. Trust in me.

I stood straight up, and began to apologize to my Father...

I'm so sorry for doubting you. You are my provider. How could I doubt you? Thank you for providing tonight and taking care of us.

I was sharing that with my small group tonight and I was telling them that God is so much bigger than a small gas crisis. He can do whatever He choses to do. He made this world and every single detail, just as He did with us and we chose to doubt Him and lose trust in Him?

Crazy.

Our adventure last Friday was a reminder for me that He loves us and He's got us in the palm of His hand. We shouldn't be worried about anything.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. - Philippians 4:6

Cast all your anxiety on Him for He cares for you. - 1Peter 5:7

**We started a Women's Fall Bible Study a few Monday's ago, and it is amazing! Be prepared to read my notes and learn about Discerning the Voice of God with me!***

A Realization

If you’ve been reading, you’ll know that I have been struggling these past couple weeks. Your prayers have been much appreciated. God is at work. Last week a teacher of mine from middle school (who reads my blog) shared a verse with me. She began to explain that she was walking to her office to e-mail me when a mom stopped her and shared a verse with her. My teacher thought it was random, but she went with it :-) I beleive the Lord used that to encourage me.

She shared Exodus 14:14 with me.

"The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.''

He’s much stronger than this restlessness I have been dealing with. I can't fight on my own, I have to be still. I am nothing without Him. He's much bigger than I am. I have to wait on the Lord, He will fight the fight for me. He will help me overcome.

I had lunch with a friend Sunday after church who encouraged me to write down the thoughts that have been bogging my mind down over the weeks. So, Monday at work I started jotting down these thoughts that have captivated my mind. As the work day came to a close, I was looking over my list. I noticed that every single thought had something in common with the others.

A time when others had taken advantage of me.

I started praying and asking the Lord to reveal to me why this issue is taking over my mind and bringing me down.

In His timing and as He’s always faithful to His word, He began to show me how my life is being affected.

Oh Father, you’re so faithful, thank you…

The Lord brought up an instance a couple weeks ago…
I was at Sonic with a couple friends one night getting some ice cream. One friend offered to pay for mine; I told her it’s okay, that I would get mine, not to worry about it.

My other friend turned around and said,

“It’s funny Christina, you love to bless people, but you won’t let them bless you.”

I laughed it off, and we went on.

Well, I thought I brushed it off, but ever since, that conversation has been playing over in my head.

Is this true, Lord? Why won’t I let people bless me?

Take a look around, my daughter, take notice of this, you tell me…

I started to realize that I don’t let people bless me and I have realized why. I love helping and serving people. I hurt when others hurt, I’m happy when their happy, I relate to them. I put my heart out there because I want to make a difference. I put my all into my relationships. Once people take hold of that, they can tend to take advantage of that. So, when people want to bless me, I fear that if I let them, I’m going to take advantage of that, and in return I’ll hurt them, just as I have been hurt. I don’t want that, I know how it feels.

It stings.

I’m not having a pity party, I don’t want that. This is reality. Something I have learned, something the Lord is revealing to me. He’s showing me how I have to grow and change because of this. I have to be stronger, not be afraid to be confrontational (I tend to say “oh it’s okay” even when it’s not), I have to be open, talk about my feelings/what’s bothering me, be bold.

It’s only because of my God that I have been able to realize this. Only because of Him that I can be made stronger. I believe He is preparing me for something bigger. Through this He is showing me my gifts; what I’m good at, my strengths and weaknesses. I believe He is getting ready to do something big with me. I look forward to that. We have to pay attention to Him. Listen to Him.

He speaks.

What is a relationship without talking and constructive criticism? I used to have a hard time with that, but I want to know the areas in my life that need fixing. If not, I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing and I could be making things worse for myself and others. I want to be excellent at the things I do. I want my relationships to be honoring and glorifying to my Father. And my relationship with Him to be so intimate. That’s what He longs for. He wants us to run to Him, turn our eyes to Him, and fix ourselves on what He has in store for us.
I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to see how His plan continues to unfold in my life. It’s so exciting to me!

Because of that, I’m thankful for being able to accept my faults and long to turn them into good so I can flourish, be a better servant, and daughter to my Father.

Restless

Christina is …restless...

It’s been awhile since I have posted, I think I was waiting for the perfect post and resolution to my problems to well up inside me.

Sorry, you’re out of luck this time.

See, I always think I have to have this perfect masterpiece of a post for you guys to read. Ok, not saying my posts are masterpieces, but I think you understand.
This time I’m just going to get down to the ‘nitty gritty’.

This last week was, well, a restless week. I found myself battling myself all week. I couldn’t sit still, my mind was racing, and I felt like I had to get out – go somewhere. My emotions were running high, I could cry at the drop of a dime. I was being hard on myself. Stressing about decisions I needed to make. I was frustrated with people. I missed my chiropractor appointments because I couldn’t make myself go. I wasn’t motivated. Some days I didn’t understand why I was feeling the way I was, but that didn’t stop me. I didn’t get much sleep. Stayed up till the wee hours of the morning thinking, writing, wondering…

I would try to change my thinking, cheer myself up, but I couldn’t, something was holding me back, some moments I felt like I couldn’t move… so I would just sit.

I found out during the middle of the week that I had some family coming in town and I realized it was a long weekend. It was what I needed, my chance to get away. I couldn’t wait to leave, I wanted to leave right then. I needed to be around family. I needed some encouragement.
So, I spent the weekend with family, I slept a lot (since I hadn’t all week) and tried to relax.

It was good.

I was distracted.

Then I got back…I made myself go back to the chiropractor today and right when I walked in one of the girls that works there… ran up and hugged me, asked if I was okay, and said she had missed me, that it had felt like forever.

Wow. I was taken back.

I told her I was fine, just a bad week and that it was great to see her too!

I proceeded to do my exercises…
Then time came to be adjusted and the Dr. walked in…

“It’s good to see you, Christina,”

“Good to see you too” I replied….

“When was the last time I saw you, it’s been awhile…”

Great, he’s going to lecture me on not being a committed patient… I could feel it coming… So I went on…

“I know, I’m sorry, I had a rough week and couldn’t make it”

At this point he continued to adjust my back, twist my neck till I thought it was going to come off…

snap… crackle… pop….

Adjustment done.

Dr. Joshua sat down next to me, looked me in the eyes, and said,

“Are you sure everything is okay? Is there anything I can do? Anything I can help with? Just let me know…”

I thanked him, assured him I was fine and everything would be okay. (while breathing a sigh of relief that he didn’t lecture me)
Now, you may be thinking, oh that’s nice… but this is unusual… why? Because he is not a very personable person. He’s in and out. I had just been telling someone that a couple days prior. So, for him to sit down and make sure I knew he cared, meant a lot to me. I appreciate things like that.

I know you’re also probably thinking, why did you tell them you were fine when you really aren’t?

Very good question.

That’s something I struggle with sometimes, other times I’m good at expressing myself. But there are times that I feel like I’m just bothering people or complaining. So, instead of talking about it I try to deal with it on my own… or I let it fester inside me. This time I didn’t say anything because I really didn’t know what was going on with me. I just knew how I felt.
Another reason for blogging, it’s like therapy to me. It lets me get out my thoughts and express myself in a way that I normally wouldn’t.

You’ve got to give it to God, Christina… I tried telling myself that many times last week…

But I found myself coming up with excuses and thinking that since I didn’t know what was going on, He wouldn’t.
Our Savior is much bigger than that. He knows every hair on our heads; He knew us and formed us before we were born. He knows our every thought, He understands us.

(Now if I could only understand myself)

Help me, Jesus, I need you. Turn my eyes to you, only you can turn things into good. Give me understanding, guidance. Give me strength.